Mom Ignores Child to Talk on the Phone. What He Does Will Devastate Your Soul

Dear Doctor F: My mother is ignoring me.  I am 11 years old and she always ignored me.  Even my sister who is younger tries to call and she doesn't say anything back.  She just yells at us saying things like "I am on the phone.  Don't you ever talk to me when I'm on the phone."  Except she is always on the phone. I have to ask her a question and cannot catch her attention.  What should I do.  -- Young NobodyDear Young Nobody:  Your mother may be suffering from Child Regret Syndrome.   She either did not want to have children or did not realize that once she had children it would cut into her personal time.  You need a catch phrase.  What I used to use with my Mom was "Quick Mom! Run! It's Elvis!"  You could try that one out, but may need to update it depending on your Mom's tastes.  If that doesn't work, consider running away from home.