With building security tightening nationwide, gun enthusiasts and criminals alike have found a novel way around pat downs and metal…

ARIES: This is your week to shine dear Aries. Put people in their places and let them know who is…

Study the little creep's face on the carton and see if you can find him before he finds you where…

Step 1: Get an old electric weedwacker. (Preferably one your Dad finds for you on the garbage.) Step 2: Plug…

Go check out Toe Fu's interview with chiptune artist 8-Bit Weapon over at the-minusworld.com Plug In, Turn On, Blip Out:…

Talbot County MD: Hundreds of witnesses have reported an army of subterranean creatures rising from the Chesapeake Bay. Green glowing…

Street Fighter Tribute I've had alot of obsessions in my day. Comics, records, pizza, mid 90's porn, rare sneakers (worst…

Capricorn- Remember it is better to kick someone in the back than to punch him or her in the face.

Find him before he finds you! Where's Creepy? Dare to find out. Study the missing creep on the milk carton…

Intercourse,PA October 15, 2008 Fritz Jacobs,owner of Jacob’s Country Market, made a puzzling discovery after investigating complaints from customers that…

Aries You should get out this week and mingle. You will ring the Eskimo to meet you at the station;…

"That's Some Good Boob Cake!" October is Breast Cancer Awareness month, today October 10th is National Boob Cake Day. Make…

Courting rituals in Nigeria are so progressive. In the USA, you can barely get away with saying hi to a…

This Madlib is based on an excerpt from Shakespeare's Hamlet. Let's make The Bard proud and modernize this Olde English…

When I was about 6 years old I had a Dad crafted fort in my back yard. It was basically…

A man filed for restraining order against his ex-wife that he divorced 16 years ago.  After their divorce, they both…

To prepare for the upcoming Halloween celebrations, EMToast has done extensive market research and delved deep into EMToast personal memory…

Our own Toe Fu's making a name for himself over at the-minusworld.com. He just scored a great interview with 30…

A 15 yr old boy lives with his uncle, in the past year the uncle has been sexually harassing the…

Fifty two year old weirdo has been eyeing his neighbor's 26 yr old hot wife who just had a baby. …

A woman filed for divorce claiming her husband forces her to have sex with him even when she does not…

ARIES- People are going to hate your guts this week, and it might have something to do with the things…

Perfume: The Story of a Murderer. A movie about a creepy sniffling baby who grows up to be a creepy…

Using the definitions provided, and your imaginations, fill out the boxes below with the correct type of word. After that…

Fuzzles Of Speed Racer Fame and Clyde, Clint Eastwood's one time companion and star of Every Which Way But Loose,…

Guys across the country are praising the new DVD/ Blu Ray release Speed Racer for it's colorful display action packed…

Clay Aiken is   really  Lindsay Lohan

HOLLYWOOD, CA - David Hasselhoff is at it again. In a stunt that shocked Knight Rider viewers and animal rights…

There was a point in time that I was a total wrestling junkie. I can admit this with no shame…

CLEVELAND, OH- The effects of a sliding national economy are being felt around the world, with many middle and lower-class,…

This couple has been married for 16 years and the husband is filing for divorce. He states that his wife…

There are albums out there that we love. Albums we have listened to over and over again. Albums we have…

A man had been having the hots for his neighbor's young Vietnamese wife for a long time. One night he…

Aries You’re feeling lucky this week, well, you are not. Black tie events are in your future, don’t screw it…

A first grade teacher has been punishing the male students in her class by pinching their nipples. When a male…

This guy would go to bookstores and try to take pictures of women with his cell phone. He got caught…

Mix one parts 28 Days Later, one part Return of the Living Dead, one part Excalibur, and one part Escape…

Three years ago a thirty-five year old man met a thirty-three year old woman online. They dated for a while,…

EMToast has done extensive market research and delved deep into EMToast personal memory banks to bring you the top 5…

Aries Your intestinal fortitude will be put to the test by weeks end. Fret not dear Aries those parasites can’t…

Chances are if you work in an office environment you are always being watched to make sure you aren't surfing…

There are a lot of albums from 10-20 years ago that when I listen to now sound better to me…

I've just finished watching the pilot episode of Fringe of Fox. I don't want to ruin it for anyone who…

We've all seen these workplace voodoo kits, they show up at Christmas parties and birthdays, and everyone gets a laugh…

Several times growing up, my dad claimed to know a secret language. He would utter several sentences of phrases containing…

Dear Internet, Sometimes I wish Al Gore never ate that quarter pound of ‘shrooms and invented you. Before you came…