Absurd World News

ARIES- The less you say the more intelligent people will think you are, well the less chances you have you…

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47 year old man was married to his 40 year old wife for almost 20 years and they have a…

24 Year old horny young man went up to the roof of his building one night trying to peak at…

I wrote this tirade on this game tape a few months back and it was just lingering in Word Press…

A 42 yr old truck driver and 40 a year old nurse have been married for 12 years and the…

A 67 year old grandmother was having an affair with a 71 year old man. One morning she called him…

Group Hepsi, commonly known as Hepsi, is a famous Turkish pop/R&B girl group. Hepatitis C (aka Hep C) is a…

Aries: Your life has become as complicated as a Marble Madness diagram. The planetary alignment of Pluto and Uranus is…

Subject: Dr. Light. Esteemed roboticist Dr. Thomas Light has long been under saucy scrutiny for his near obsessive creations of…

If you were a kid in the 70’s or 80’s living in the NJ/NY area, you know the true meaning…

A 53 year old truck driver ran out of gas on the highway. He parked the truck on the shoulder…

A man suspected someone broke into his house and called the police. The police showed up and searched the whole…

photo credit: eye of einstein Coming up with an appropriate blessing for your Thanksgiving day feast can be difficult. This…

ARIES- The alignment of the planets suggests you might be thinking of making your crush a token of affection from…

Two girls were sitting outside chatting.  This guy walked funny passing them and they didn't think too much of it. …

With building security tightening nationwide, gun enthusiasts and criminals alike have found a novel way around pat downs and metal…

ARIES: This is your week to shine dear Aries. Put people in their places and let them know who is…

Study the little creep's face on the carton and see if you can find him before he finds you where…

Go check out Toe Fu's interview with chiptune artist 8-Bit Weapon over at the-minusworld.com Plug In, Turn On, Blip Out:…

Talbot County MD: Hundreds of witnesses have reported an army of subterranean creatures rising from the Chesapeake Bay. Green glowing…

Street Fighter Tribute I've had alot of obsessions in my day. Comics, records, pizza, mid 90's porn, rare sneakers (worst…

Capricorn- Remember it is better to kick someone in the back than to punch him or her in the face.

Find him before he finds you! Where's Creepy? Dare to find out. Study the missing creep on the milk carton…

Intercourse,PA October 15, 2008 Fritz Jacobs,owner of Jacob’s Country Market, made a puzzling discovery after investigating complaints from customers that…

Aries You should get out this week and mingle. You will ring the Eskimo to meet you at the station;…

"That's Some Good Boob Cake!" October is Breast Cancer Awareness month, today October 10th is National Boob Cake Day. Make…

Courting rituals in Nigeria are so progressive. In the USA, you can barely get away with saying hi to a…

This Madlib is based on an excerpt from Shakespeare's Hamlet. Let's make The Bard proud and modernize this Olde English…

When I was about 6 years old I had a Dad crafted fort in my back yard. It was basically…

A man filed for restraining order against his ex-wife that he divorced 16 years ago.  After their divorce, they both…

To prepare for the upcoming Halloween celebrations, EMToast has done extensive market research and delved deep into EMToast personal memory…

Our own Toe Fu's making a name for himself over at the-minusworld.com. He just scored a great interview with 30…

A 15 yr old boy lives with his uncle, in the past year the uncle has been sexually harassing the…

Fifty two year old weirdo has been eyeing his neighbor's 26 yr old hot wife who just had a baby. …

A woman filed for divorce claiming her husband forces her to have sex with him even when she does not…

ARIES- People are going to hate your guts this week, and it might have something to do with the things…

Perfume: The Story of a Murderer. A movie about a creepy sniffling baby who grows up to be a creepy…

Using the definitions provided, and your imaginations, fill out the boxes below with the correct type of word. After that…

Fuzzles Of Speed Racer Fame and Clyde, Clint Eastwood's one time companion and star of Every Which Way But Loose,…

Guys across the country are praising the new DVD/ Blu Ray release Speed Racer for it's colorful display action packed…

Clay Aiken is   really  Lindsay Lohan

HOLLYWOOD, CA - David Hasselhoff is at it again. In a stunt that shocked Knight Rider viewers and animal rights…

There was a point in time that I was a total wrestling junkie. I can admit this with no shame…

CLEVELAND, OH- The effects of a sliding national economy are being felt around the world, with many middle and lower-class,…

This couple has been married for 16 years and the husband is filing for divorce. He states that his wife…

There are albums out there that we love. Albums we have listened to over and over again. Albums we have…