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Absurd World News

Obama Bombs Buckingham Palace

President Obama was taking a helicopter tour over Buckingham Palace. The vibration of the chopper combined with the Xtra-Large coffee…

June 26, 2009
Art of the Folked

Laser Dog Protects Billy Wizard's Shit

Billy Wizard and Laser Dog Sent in by 7 year old Fritzy McGee of Lansing Michigan Fritzy writes: "HI Emtoast,…

June 26, 2009
Absurd World News

Suck My Bolt: Robot Uprising Begins

The robot uprising has begun. The first soldier in the war against humans was a tiny worker bot named robot…

June 25, 2009
Absurd World News

Stripper Branded with Diarrhea Tramp Stamp

Claritza was a young pretty stripper. She supported her family on the earnings she made in just a few nights…

June 25, 2009
Art of the Folked

Dirty Germs With Comb Overs

Readers submission from Fritzy McGee (age 7) of Lansing Michigan Fritzy writes: "dear emtoast, you are delicious in the morning…

June 25, 2009
Absurd World News

Track Star Crippled During Video Game Speed Run

Rancho Cucamonga, CA - While browsing the internet during study hall one fall afternoon, high school hurdle hopper Harold Hamstrung…

June 20, 2009
Absurd World News

The Boy Who Became a Pervy Old Man

When I was a boy I used to see these dirty old perverts and I’d say to myself man that’s…

June 19, 2009
Absurd World News

Mike the Bear Wakes Up. ROAR!!!

MIKE WAKES UP ROAR!!! Look how happy he is in the morning. He stretches his legs and pounds his chest.

June 18, 2009
Art of the Folked

help me i am so sick i think i have wet tail

Wet tail is a terrible affliction that can infect your pet hamster or even cartoon mice.  Beware the wet tail. …

June 14, 2009
Art of the Folked

I Ate My Dentist

These days you just never know who is going to cannibalize you.  This kid looks all innocent until he opens…

June 8, 2009
Art of the Folked

Roll Out Your Favorite Head

Inspired by the song Hall of Heads by They Might Be Giants although the lyric is actually roll out that…

June 8, 2009
Absurd World News

Hidden van Gogh Painting Discovered in Berlin Museum

Mens van de Ezels de Slepende Hond By Theodore van Gogh Curators at the Staatliche Museen zu Berlin have discovered…

June 5, 2009
Absurd World News

Man Kills Girlfriend Because She Won't Give Blow Job

“Mike” and his girlfriend had been dating for nearly a year. No matter how much he begged her, she would…

May 31, 2009
Absurd World News

Don's Wife Leaves Him for Another Woman

There was a rumor about Don. His wife came home from work and found him lying on the couch, in…

May 30, 2009
Absurd World News

Nocturnal Creature Stalks New Jersey Suburb

Fairlawn, NJ- The normally quiet nights of this lazy suburb have been pierced by strange mewling noises, what is even…

May 25, 2009
Absurd World News

9 Year Old Boy Commits Suicide After Learning Mummies Are Real

Lodi, NJ – A 9 year old 5th grader attending Hillstop School in Lodi NJ has committed suicide after a…

May 24, 2009
Absurd World News

Husband Caught Having Sex With Bible Study Partner

A sick woman was suspicious of husband having an affair and had her son install a GPS Global Positioning System…

May 23, 2009
Absurd World News

Swine Flu Posters to Appear in Public Restrooms

May 14, 2009
Absurd World News

Russian Scientist Takes Tunguska Creature on Tropical Vacation

May 14, 2009
Art of the Folked

God Loves Swine Flu

May 14, 2009
Absurd World News

Crooked P.I.s Blackmail & Threaten to Spoon Out Client’s Eyes

A divorced woman got dumped by her new boyfriend after 6 months for no reason . She was suspicious that…

May 3, 2009
Absurd World News

Massage Parlor Whore Swallows Used Condom to Evade Police

A 31 year old male student found out that a certain Massage Center provides Full Services, so he bought a…

May 2, 2009
Art of the Folked

Art of the Folked: West Dakota Bad Ass

West Dakota Bad Ass – By Micheloebangelo

May 2, 2009
Absurd World News

Band of Zombie Gorillas Discovered In Congo

A band of zombie gorillas has been discovered in the African Congo. Piles of dead Gorillas are left everywhere by…

April 28, 2009
Absurd World News

Tiny Anchorman to Replace CBS NEWS Katie Couric

Dissatisfied with the poor performance of Katie Couric, Sean McManus, president of CBS News and Don Hewitt, CBS news executive…

April 27, 2009
Absurd World News

Russian Scientist's Family Adopts Tunguska Creature

Professor Chekaren Suslov has unofficially adopted the creature he is credited with discovering while on an expedition in in the…

April 22, 2009
Absurd World News

Strange Creature Discovered in Tunguska Wasteland

Lake Cheko- Scientists have discovered an previously unknown species in the center of the Tunguska Region. This strange discovery comes…

April 20, 2009
Art of the Folked

Creepy Dinner, Just Like Mom Used to Make

April 20, 2009
Absurd World News

Fetal Dental Deformity to Blame for Potential Recall of Chiclets Tooth Enhancing Gum

A recall may be in the future for Cadbury Adams Tooth Enhancing Gum. The FDA has forced the company to…

April 20, 2009
Absurd World News

Creature Racing Voted Greatest Video Game Video of All Time

By me. This is one of those videos that you just keep coming back to year after year after year.

April 19, 2009
Curious Ideas

Assholder: Start Your New Career Now!

Who says there aren’t any jobs available? You an always move to the UK and become an ass holder.

April 19, 2009
Curious Ideas

Ass Dragging Werewolf Leads Pack of Chickens

A baby Ass dragging werewolf thinks a chicken is his mother. He grows up to lead pack of chickens. A…

April 18, 2009
Absurd World News

Black Swan Love Triangle Results In Babies

Two black swans were donated to Wooleng Park, in Taiwan back in 2002. The two swans were very close and…

April 18, 2009
Art of the Folked

Pervert Breaks in House and Ruins Easter

Little Billy and Suzy came running downstairs first thing in the morning in search of their Easter baskets. Only to…

April 12, 2009
Art of the Folked

Art of the Folked: I'M Not Emo I'm Goth, Right?

I’m Not Emo, I’m Goth, Right? – By Micheloebangelo

April 11, 2009
Art of the Folked

Paris Hilton Suffers Stroke as Blanche Deveraux

April 9, 2009
Absurd World News

Grabbing Female Student’s Ass And Chest “No Big Deal”

A still single 50 year old man was sitting in the first row by the door on a bus on…

April 8, 2009
Absurd World News

12 Baby Boars Follow Owner for 13 Mile Ride

Mr. Lee has loved animals all his life and has had many pets. He started keeping wild boars a few…

April 6, 2009
Absurd World News

Incredible Hulk Madlibs for Puny Humans

Using the definitions provided, and your inner rampaging jade giant , fill out the boxes below with the correct type…

April 5, 2009
Absurd World News

“Dead Rabbit” Dr. Denys Committing Innocent Girl

A Denver woman who believed her daughter to be suffering from bi-polar disorder attempted to have her committed to St.

April 4, 2009
Art of the Folked

Art of the Folked: Cherry Cheeks Beauty &; Smiling Virgin

Cherry Cheeks Beauty - By Micheloebangelo The Smiling Virgin – By Micheloebangelo

April 2, 2009
Art of the Folked

J-Lo Pixelates Her Pants

Absolutely Disgusting!

March 29, 2009
Absurd World News

Whiny Guy Handcuffed to Ex-Wife and Beaten

Just because your crackhead ex-wife handcuffs herself to you, that doesn't give you an excuse to be a baby. Feed…

March 28, 2009
Curious Ideas

Fucking Cloaking Device

http://www.fuckingcloakingdevice.com/ I wonder if this guy got the job?

March 27, 2009
Absurd World News

5 Mistresses Compete To Keep Lover, Reduce Costs

Due to the economy and wanting to save his cost of keeping 5 mistress, an entrepreneur in China asked his…

March 26, 2009
Absurd World News

J-Lo Shits Her Pants

J-Lo has no shame for her shit stain.  Looks uncomfortable. See how she’s grabbing at those shit packed pants.  Gross.

March 25, 2009
Absurd World News

Semen Throwing Man Impregnates Victims

One night on the train home with her friends, a woman’s friends pointed out to her that she's had some…

March 25, 2009
Absurd World News

“Blood Dump” Most Offensive Term, Period

Results of a 2008 patient care survey taken at NY/ NJ/ PA hospitals have found the most offensive term Health…

March 21, 2009
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